Sunday, 12 May 2013

final assessment. yoga. done.

Done but not yet dusted.  On Saturday I sat a written exam (wow, that's a first for many years!) swiftly followed by a practical teaching assessment.  Us 4 final year students chose a colour and were hence randomly assigned a list of postures to teach. 

I chose green and hence picked what was basically my worst nightmare selection of postures. 

Parivrtta Trikonasana
Parivrtta Ardha Chandrasana
Parsvottasana
'thread the needle' (??)
Halasana - Salambar Sarvangasana
Supta Virasana

If you know what they are.... even the ones that are 'easier' are my personal least favourites because my body finds them really tricky to do.  Some postures that others find tricky are fine with me and the way my hips bend.  But even Supta Virasana is hell for me. 

I got the poses and my immediate response was.  I think I am going to cry.  And then I did cry.  And it was hell.  Luckily I was third so I had 2 sets of teaching to actually do some Yoga and get myself calmed down a bit, stop freaking out and work out how the hell I was going to teach this, coming from any kind of 'right place'.

I have no idea how I did.  I went for lightness and humour.  To be honest, its not as if your average class is going to find these easy anyway. 

And the damn parivrtta aspect means that you have to work out how to teach it when at some point the class is going to be turning away from you, or you them.......

All I can say of this, is that I did not leave the hall.  I did manage to stop crying and pull myself together to teach wtih humour and lightness.  So much of what I learnt went right out the window as I just focused on  - well....... just doing it.  I really freaked out, in test time panic,  like those nightmare dreams where you have to perfom but you do not know the words.  It felt like facing a fear quite frankly, and if I don't pass, then what the hell.  I did get up and give it a good old go.  I don't think I did anything truly unsafe.  But any finer points of teaching, which I may have brought to the table in postures I felt more confident with, were not there.  At least.  I know how I can teach a posture I know really well, when I am relaxed and fully prepared.  And that wasn't quite it. 

We don't automatically pass or fail.  There is a follow up call, in which we must correct anything we know we got wrong and discuss to the assessors satisfaction any other areas which they feel need discussing.  And this is not immediate.  But...... sigh.  as in phew.  as in I am not facing it again (ha! at least I HOPE not - it can happen!!) I don't think I was consiously aware of how stressed I was about it until it was over.

We followed it up with the most amazingly delicious meal at Terre a Terre, and in the end I  did get a ticket to go see Sutra. I feel quite relieved.  Wow 2 years.  And its over.  Or, it has just begun. 

xxx Namaste xxx

4 comments:

SwirlyGirl said...

I had to google these postures! and it brought back memories of doing them in Yoga, well I say doing them, more like "attempting" to do them. So a big congratulations to you for having to teach them!! how you can talk and do the pose at the same time is amazing. You certainly have been on a journey with your Yoga and congratulations for getting to the end but also the beginning. xxx

HowtoBEaCOOLoldLady said...

Ah, to be honest doing them is a struggle for me too. its not something I would teach in one of my classes, apart from for a bit of fun and experimentation into the realms of the unknown! This was why it was tricky. And why I got upset when I saw them. At least I remembered what they were. xxxx

Anonymous said...

The only one I have any idea of is thread the needle ;-) well done you xx

Anonymous said...

Its like you read my thoughts! You seem to grasp a lot
about this, like you wrote the book in it or something.
I think that you could do with some % to power the message house a little bit, but other than
that, this is excellent blog. A fantastic read.
I'll definitely be back.

Feel free to visit my homepage Try This