Frustration & Delight

Somone on facebook asked, "what motivates you?" and initally I was just going to write delight.  or Freedom or some such postive thing.  But in truth one of my biggest motivators is frustration. 

Its when I am really pissed off about something, I kick in and do something about it. 

So on Friday I was really pissed off.  I don't know why - I had had a brilliant day.  But I ended it with feeling all annoyed and angry and I took it out on the house. 

Here goes the venting.  Our house needs SO MUCH doing to it and I need more MONEY to do it and I want it to be sorted ALREADY!!! ESPECIALLY that damn dripping tap (etc etc)

Dripping tap has truly gone beyond.  It cannot be stopped, not even with extra vigorous turning.  And needs the extra vigorous turning in order to not actually be running.  It is seriously annoying.

Oh and its not just that, there are a whole host of things that were annoying me, the state of the rug in the living room, the crappy kitchen, the ceiling in the hall, the back garden, the door, the windows, the curtains.... ah, you know.  EVERYTHING.

And so I sat down and wrote down my main frustrations.  The things that were really BUGGING me.  And because it has been part of my work life for the last 2 years, and really I ought to know how to do this,  I took myself through the process. 

1.what is bugging you?
2. How would it be if it were all sorted / ticked off the list / DONE?
3. What is the teeny tiniest step you can take RIGHT NOW to start moving towards that end result.

So -  the house.  OK there is the roof extension and a new kitchen and so on, but the main end result is  "I have a beautiful home that I am proud of".
And I figured that even though I won't be sorting all of it just now, I could, at least, make it as beautiful as I possibly can, right now.  I could clean it thoroughly and give it a paint job. 

And I could get the handyman round to fix the DAMN TAP (and the tile grouting in the bathroom and that broken light fitting)

So on Saturday I started cleaning (there was this particular area on the kitchen ceiling, that I had started cleaning a while ago, and in fact had just made things worse and smeary and it looked hideous - that was first) and I got some paint, and started painting.  Man it was already making a HUGE difference.  I had no idea actually how grubby my kitchen walls had become, this lick of paint thing was a really good idea.

I called our handyman and he came around and quoted £120 inc taps (maybe less ) for the work.  Its being done on Friday.  Sooner if it rains.

And I got some herbs (on offer 9 for £5!) and planted them in the garden.  

Hub and Bub cleaned the front of the house, swept the steps and washed the windows.  The kitchen is nearly finished and I will be starting on the hallway tomorrow night.

But the very most main thing about all of this.  Is how I feel.  I feel SO energised and good.  SO MUCH better than the ranty, grumpy despondent beast I had become on Friday night. 

Stopping, having a bit of a think, working out what I really want and DOING something about it dramatically changes you feel.

(still a lot of painting to get done tho......)